While you were all retching up day-old Natty Light and catching VD's, people like Emily were fighting the good fight. Shame on all of you, now let's get it together and start submitting people.
Really, my compliments to the ground crew.
First guy: Senior girls are harder to fuck than freshmen, because they're like, looking for a relationship and shit.
Second guy: Yeah, and the freshmen girls have like, black-lights, and fifty people in a double. It just DOESN'T work!
First guy: Wow, this grass is impeccable!
Second guy: Yeah, it looks so much nicer without all the ugly signs.
-Overheard by Emily in the Dustbowl.
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