Thursday, December 27, 2007

Post Jesus Day Pick Me Up

Normally we don't go to print over the holidays, but in a rare show of Christmas spirit, I've decided to do the world a freakin' favor and post a few items that were sent to me in the last few days. Consider this the Overheard equivalent of when your uncle Morty forgets to get you presents for the 25th, and then crappy Marshall's red tag sale items start showing up under your tree on the 27th.

Seriously, how dare these people try to teach their children another language!?

girl #1: Uggh I have so much work plus i have to babysit and I hate this family. They actually make me talk in Spanish to the kid and read him, like, books in Spanish.
girl #2: Wow that sounds awful!
girl #1: I know, I can't understand it. They're not at all Hispanic! Not one bit!

- Overheard by Tom in McElroy

Africa bracelet or no Africa bracelet, this is still annoying as hell when people do it.

girl #1: So I got in here the other day and some girl took the elevator from the third floor to the fifth.
girl #2: Eww! Did you yell at her? Who was this?
girl #1: I don't know. Some bitch with one of those Africa bracelets on.
girl #2: Oh so she's a self-righteous bitch.

Overheard by Tom, Rubenstein Elevator

I believe Cleopatra is mentioned quite frequently in the Book of Judges.

Girl: And you know what else? Jesus wasn't actually blonde. He was just portrayed that way.
Guy: Yeah, actually, in Harlem, Jesus is African.
Girl: Yeah, and Biblical figures like Cleopatra are clearly black even though they are portrayed as white.

Overheard by Stephanie in the Rat

Sunday, December 16, 2007

Insert Culturally Sensitive Holiday Greeting Here

Looks like my vague threat to kill a Nazi puppy lit a fire under some of your asses. I'm not gonna try to be too witty here, since I am currently slaving away during exam week. So let's get to it, shall we? This will probs be the last post of 2007. I might do a year end recap if I get around to it with some of my favorite submissions.

Keep an eye out for these girls on VHI's "Rock of Love II!"

Girl A: "No, she's like my identical twin cousin."
Girl B: "Really? wait..."
Girl A: "I mean, we're not actually twins, we just look exactly alike."
Girl B: "Oh, okay. I was wondering how that works. Actually, I think that can happen."
Girl A: "What?"
Girl B: "Yeah, it has to do with genes or something."

Overheard by Caroline in Lower

The train of logic these two Rhodes scholars are following inevitably leads to a horrific derailing.

freshman guy 1: "dude, study days are awesome. there's nothing better than getting wasted everyday for a week before finals."
freshman guy 2: "i know, right man? its so helpful."
freshman guy 1: "yeah like, it's so hard to think when you're drunk, so it's like you're training your brain. so when you stop drinking and take finals, its so easy to think!"
freshman guy 2: "yeah! like baseball players that swing leaded bats before they go up to bat. then when they swing the regular bat, its so much easier!"
freshman guy 1: "yeah! lets get drunk!"

Overheard by Abby on Upper

Mariah Carey also composed "Ode to Joy" if you really think about it.

Boy 1: I'm listening to the Hallelujah Chorus...
Boy 2: The what?
Boy 1: The hallelujah chorus.
Boy 2: Is that by the visionary, um, Mariah Carey?

Overheard by Anonymous in Walsh.

I mean what I'm trying to say is that poetry likes dudes and that those dudes like to have sex with poetry.

Bro: No dude, I'm not saying that poetry is gay like that, I'm just saying that compared to other things it's pretty gay.

Overheard by Nick at some party in Ignacio

Monday, December 3, 2007

Back For More Sucka

Why you're absolutely right astute reader of Overheard at BC, it has been a long time since we've last had a sizable update. Do you know why that's been the case? Well if you guessed because we don't have enough submissions to make updates a weekly, or even once every two week occurrence, then you are correct! Overheard at BC relies on you, slobs who procrastinate on the Internet while studying in Lower, for all our wacky and irreverent content! Yes, Overheard at BC truly is the democratic spirit in action, but only when we all pull together. So please, don't make me shoot the puppy* that I have tied up in my closet because we aren't getting enough submissions. Fido's life is in your hands...

She's actually planning on giving it all to me, to hold on to for safe keeping. Yeah, that's the ticket.
girl #1: did you hear she's taking next semester off instead of going abroad?
girl #2: and her parents are giving her all the money they would be spending on tuition! what is she going to do with 30 thousand dollars?

overheard at eagle's nest by jess

I mean, it's true. If she continues to eat constantly at all hours she will get fat. That's science right there for you.
(girl eating cereal at beginning of class)
Professor #1: Do you EVER stop eating?... If you keep eating like that, you're going to be fat.

Why yes, I do believe that this technically counts as murder, but only above the Mason-Dixon line.
Professor #1: If I hit a pregnant woman with a baseball bat, and killed her baby, it's murder, isn't it?... Of course it is!

Guy's also got a bumper sticker on his car that reads "Keep honking, I'm reloading."
Professor: And that's the 11th Commandment: "Screw everybody else."

All Overheard by Anonymous in what has to be the wackiest class at BC Law EVER.

And now for the submission that will ensure our place at the top of every on-campus progressive group's watch list...
guy in men's room to friend: Man, you get major bracket points for peeing in her bed.

Overheard by Anna in what I can only assume was the Men's Room.
* Just kidding folks! I'd never harm a puppy. Unless it was a Nazi puppy, then I'd have no choice.